Preaching Sick (not sick of preaching)

I hate being sick!

Ok, now that I’ve stated it, I feel better…

There is nothing more interesting than preaching when you are sick. Your brain is fuzzy, your body aches, you are trying to remember to not snort your runny noise (because your microphone will pick it up and amplify it), the desire to cough consumes your conscious brain’s attention to the point that you forget what you’re going to say and you just hope you don’t pass out because you know that will concern everyone.

Yesterday, I was the definition of sick. What was far more interesting than being sick was a message that I’d been incubating for more than two months and I knew that this was the time to open it up. I had such grand ideas as to how it would play out and now here I was sick, definitely off my game and wondering if I was crazy for showing up at all.

This is what I love about Holy Spirit. He really doesn’t need our help. Really. We just think he does. We get so caught up in our part that we usually overlook his. When you are sick, I think he must be smiling because he knows that you aren’t going to have any other option but to let him do what he does so well.

I haven’t yet listened to the service, but I’ve gotten quite a few comments. I didn’t plan on having a “fire tunnel,” but one showed up. I wasn’t able to “worship,” but experienced the presence of the supernatural in a most uncommon way.

Note to self, pretend that you are sick more often…

Did heaven invade earth?

Behold, “The Quadriginoctuple Frap.”

Really.

I’m a coffee lover. Not necessarily a connoisseur, though perhaps a snob. I like coffee.

We started this exotic affair, coffee and I, when I was in graduate school way back in the 70′s (have you noticed that all good things started in the 70′s?). I started with instant, but soon discovered the tantalizing pleasures of percolated and drip; it would be years before “cappuccino,” “expression” and “shots” would make their way into my vocabulary. While living in Brazil, this torrid affair brewed into something really steamy (sorry, it seemed appropriate). I was introduced to the coffee “sock.” Oh, my! A sock is passed on from mother to daughter, is never washed and improves with age and the accumulation of coffee in the fabric. The end result is an elixir of coffee flavor! French presses don’t even come close to it.

But, I am detouring from the piece of heaven mentioned above, “The Quadriginoctuple Frap.”

A 48 shot of expresso in a 52-ounce venti (Italian for “large”)! Whoa! All the other “stuff” just watered it all down and took away from the coffee itself; almost a sin, but I’ll extend grace to the fellow (Beau Chevassus) because he is so young and hasn’t had time to develop a proper palate for the bean.

Starbucks charged him $47.30, but, the baristas had so much admiration for his pleasure that they gave it to him for free. Proof that it was indeed, divine…

I’ve been Facebooked!

I just opened up Facebook this morning.

There was a video of a cat putting on a cat hat (odes to Dr. Seuss)
There was a video of a couple in a truck putting a ladder in a dumpster so three trapped bear cubs could get out
There was a video of an unwary man being eaten by a killer whale
There was a video of US Marines dancing and rapping

And that was just in the first page.

Then came a flurry of “Good Mornings,” “Made it through the nights,” and “Let’s get this day starteds,” in two languages.  There were all the workout plans, Bible verses and quaint platitudes sprinkled around like pixie dust, mixed with all the profile photo changes.

I had another 10 total strangers wanting to be my friend, invitations to join some group I’ve never heard of, people who I know are intelligent trying to get me to play children’s games and various invites to events that are foreign to me. I’ve seen smiling dogs, crying cats, startled babies, people working out, weird collages of weird stuff, every kind of sign imaginable and things that I simply don’t know what they are. Whew!

Seems I’m not a good Facebooker; I browse, I don’t graze. Five minutes on Facebook is typically four minutes too much. I’ve “hidden” as many people’s posts as I have people who are active and I’ve only “unfriended” one person, a pastor, no less.

It seems to be a strange way to be “social.”

I wonder if the Roman Empire had a version of Facebook before it fell to the barbarians…

He’s back!

After a very long hiatus, I’m back into the world of blogging.

For almost 5 years I wrote blogs almost daily; the well dried up. You know it’s time to start up again when the ideas, thoughts and ruminations begin to consume you, making you think of ways to say what is in your head in a way that will grab the attention of others. I am definitely at that point!

So what do you do when you’re ready to start? You refer to someone else’s blog!

This blog actually was the straw that broke the camel’s back. Once I read it, I knew I had no choice; begin to share or burst. So, I strongly suggest that you follow this link and go to Dr. Joseph Mercola’s site and read about the dangers and the farce of what we call medical “science.” Women, this is a MUST read, a potentially “life-and-death” issue for you.

We’re moving faster and faster into the Orwellian nightmare of the “Big Brother” world of “1984;” if good people keep quiet, what right do we have to complain when evil becomes dominant?

Quiver getting heavy

My middle daughter sent me a text message this morning around 4:30 am letting me know I’d just added an 8lb 15oz, heavy-duty, arrow to my quiver:

Don’t you see that children are God’s best gift? the fruit of the womb his generous legacy? Like a warrior’s fistful of arrows are the children of a vigorous youth. Oh, how blessed are you parents, with your quivers full of children! Your enemies don’t stand a chance against you; you’ll sweep them right off your doorstep.

Yes, I know that applies to the dad; but genealogy place me squarely at the head of the line.

I’ve got some prolific children. Miles William Gann makes number 10!

He’s extra special… he now shares the date with my queen. Yessir! Double blessing is mine today!

My head is going to explode!

Maybe I just don’t know how to use it; maybe I do and it just an irritating feature that lots of folks like. Maybe YOU can help me!

In Facebook, every time someone does anything –adds a friend, changes their profile picture, blows their nose, etc.– you are informed that this activity happened. How do I make it stop?

I have far more of that coming in than actual status updates. I often feel like a mind reader out in public… I’m hearing everyone’s inane thoughts about nothing and it’s driving me crazy!

Original iPads, half price

I just had to pass this along…

If you are interested in getting an original iPad, I have access through a contact. These are new units and are in the original factory wrapping, not off the back of a truck. They are from a hospital contract that was canceled due to government cutbacks.

The numbers are limited – the fellow only has twenty and they are going for less than half price, so it’s first come first serve.

He has already sold one (pic is below so you can see what you are getting).

Get back to me as quick as you can if you want one.

Funny, but very true

Three surgeons are discussing who makes the best patients to operate on.

The first surgeon says, “Electricians are the best. Everything inside
is color-coded.”

The second surgeon says, “No, I think librarians are. Everything inside them is in alphabetical order.”

The third surgeon shut them up when he said, ” You’re both wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. They have no guts, no heart, no balls, no brain and no spine. Plus the head and rectum are interchangeable.”

Raising, or studying, Hell?

I’ve been in hell a lot recently.

Not the figurative one, the literal one. And to be technically correct, I haven’t been physically there; I’ve been immersed in the concept of it.

I’ve been reading many authors, including those in the Bible, and am beginning to realize that I don’t know much about hell. I guess you could say I don’t know a hell of a lot about it. I find that strange because I thought I knew everything about it.

I must thank the detractors of Rob Bell and his book on Hell (Love Wins) for generating this interest.

Like so many of the tenets of belief in the Nazarene, what you may initially perceive may not necessarily be the reality. We are far too quick to shoot first and sort it all out later. This is true not just on this topic but on so many of those things we call doctrines and theology.

This has created many walking wounded. It has sent many running in the opposite direction, disgusted, abused and angry. It has guaranteed that countless others will refuse to hear the offer.

Some will not hear what I’m saying and will put words in my mouth that I’ve not spoken nor implied. That is sad.

Hell is very real. Do we even comprehend what that means? Is it necessary to make it the reason for accepting heaven? I fear that such a stance is a doctrinal faux pas.

Lights! Wow!

I love it when somebody “gets it.”

Misconceptions, illusions, outright lies and then, suddenly, the light comes on. The look on their face is priceless. The change that comes about in their life is nothing short of miraculous. Keeping it can be work.

Oh, what complicated webs we can weave!

Destroying the lie of who we think we are can be difficult; living as who we really are can be downright impossible.

Unless the lights come on. And the door stays locked after the “guest” is escorted out.

I’ll be explicit… I am the Gate for the sheep. All those others are up to no good—sheep stealers, every one of them. But the sheep didn’t listen to them. I am the Gate. Anyone who goes through me will be cared for—will freely go in and out, and find pasture. A thief is only there to steal and kill and destroy. I came so they can have real and eternal life, more and better life than they ever dreamed of.

You cannot do it by yourself. Cell life. Its a necessity.