I am where I am in my beliefs after decades of living. They didn’t come overnight. Comparing them today with thirty years ago creates the sense that, either then or now, I am or was a pod-person. Remember the old movie, Invasion of the Body Snatchers? With the exception of the panic, that is how I often view this dynamic process that I’m constantly going through.

My whole understanding of church, faith and Jesus is so different today. It almost seems simplistic. Granted, I think that is good; I see Acts as the church roadmap, the Gospels as the unadulterated Jesus and the epistles as the faith handbook. I often wonder why what I’m understanding isn’t what others understand.

This morning I came across an interview Christianity Today recently had with Francis Chan. I really liked it… it “resonated” with me, even put in words what I’m passionately and crazily running after. I wish everyone who has anything to do with “church” or “faith” could and would read it. It definitely gets the “possibility” juices flowing.

Here’s an extended quote. Go read the whole thing.

In your new book you write, “I cannot convince people to be obsessed with Jesus, and that’s why you need the Holy Spirit.” When did you come to that realization?

Once you pastor for a while, it dawns on you that nailing a sermon doesn’t mean lives will change. Or you’ll meet a person who’s surrendered everything to Christ, and you’ll realize that your sermon wasn’t even good and nothing you did caused him to become a believer.

There was a guy who had been in our church for 15 years. One day he told me my preaching hadn’t changed him. He said I spoke too much about the “narrow road” and how everyone needs to be radical for Christ. But he said there’s also a “middle road” where people like him can do a lot of good things. I was floored by that. He’s sat under my teaching for 15 years and he still believes there isn’t only a wide easy road and a narrow difficult road, but also a middle road? I’ve been told many times that my teaching is really helpful, that I make things simple for people to understand. And then you hear something like that.

That’s when I remember, I cannot make someone fall in love with Jesus.

It really came home for me, literally, with my own teenage daughter, who, 18 months ago, was not in love with Jesus. I spent nights crying, bawling, praying to the Lord. Here I am known for my ability to communicate, but there was nothing I could do for my own daughter that would make her fall in love with Jesus. Of course I could still guide and lead her, but I was powerless to convict her.

I prayed, “God, either your Spirit comes into her or your Spirit doesn’t. It doesn’t matter how great a dad I am. I cannot bring her to life.”

And what happened?

One day she came into my room and said, “You were right, Dad. The Holy Spirit was not in me. But now he is.” She talked about how near she was to God and how everything had changed. My wife and I were skeptical. We wanted to see evidence of change. But 18 months later, I can say she really is a new creation. I didn’t do that. It was the Holy Spirit.

I’ve got to quit trying to play the Holy Spirit’s role by forcing, manipulating, talking, and programming people into the change I want to see. Instead I’ve got to spend more time praying that the Holy Spirit would come into their lives and regenerate them.

So what’s the point of all the work, sermon prep, and programs if the outcome is out of our hands?

Some of our toil is wasted, because we’re toiling believing that these things change people. I believe a lot more of our work needs to be put into prayer, study of the Word, and trusting God. I could spend an extra ten hours on every sermon, trying to get every word just right, but my time would be much better spent out sharing the gospel with people and praying.